Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
