How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I DEMAND FORESKIN
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize