remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Randomize
