escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Randomize
