i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
