I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Randomize
