He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
