he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
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