You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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