when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
