dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
how does that bad decision feel?
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
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