Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize
