Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize