You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Randomize