Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Randomize
