I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Randomize
