Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
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