Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Randomize