Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
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