Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
