his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
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