his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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