I'm sorry my penis didn't work
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Randomize
