So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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