I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
