Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Randomize