question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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