is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I don't deserve a penis
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Randomize
