The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
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