your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Randomize
