By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Dicks are not precious.
Randomize
