you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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