What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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