How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
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