I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
