You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Randomize
