Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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