you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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