im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Randomize
