You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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