This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
All the doctor said was why
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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