Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
Randomize
