Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Randomize
