Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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