Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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