Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
It's shark week go big or go home
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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