you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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