let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
