they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
