My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
