he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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